I don't know if you've seen this before, but it's a HOOT!
Cheers,
Alicia
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Gretchen Anderson <Gretchen(a)france44.com>
Date: Fri, Dec 12, 2008 at 1:46 PM
Subject: FW: A Must Read......
To: Alicia Anderson <sauternes76(a)gmail.com>
------------------------------
*From:* Mary Paustis [mailto:mwpaustis@comcast.net]
*Sent:* Tuesday, November 11, 2008 6:14 AM
*To:* 'Bill Paustis'; Djpaustis(a)aol.com; Wohlra7(a)aol.com; 'Greg and Becky
Kupka'
*Subject:* FW: A Must Read......
------------------------------
*IMPORTANT HEALTH ADVICE FOR WOMEN!!!*
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist
about Chardonnay.
Chardonnay is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about
yourself and your actions. Chardonnay can help ease you out of your shyness
and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about
anything.
You will notice the benefits of Chardonnay almost immediately and with a
regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you
from living the life you want to live.
Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover
many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with
Chardonnay.
Chardonnay may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing
should not use Chardonnay. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or
becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic
lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of
virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry
mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip
Poker, Truth Or Dare, and Naked Twister.
*WARNINGS: -*
* The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you are whispering when
you are not.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to tell your friends over and
over again that you love them.
** The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to think you can sing.*
* The consumption of Chardonnay may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are
really dying for you to telephone them* at four in the morning*.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you can logically
converse with members of the opposite sex
without spitting.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
*Now Just Imagine What You Could Achieve With a Good Dry Red!!!*